Light

I no longer need to see the light at the end of tunnel
no longer need to look forward to such

any day, i can open door to a world of darkness
but i can choose to switch on the lights or rest in peace

=)

taking control

my mentality was that im nvr ready, im nt prepared, etc
that made me strive to move on and on,
nw i have a chance to slow down the pace and steps.
hw shud i deal with life? esp when uni is coming soon

can my optimism, slightly new-found, bring me through?
or still some selfdoubt hold me back like it used to?

can my reinforced confidence shine my path?
or still some sense of insecurity clamp my courage?

i wondered a lot of things, and i dunno if i have done the correct things
yes the past week i really dunno whether i should have done what i did
or say what i said, or chose what i chose to do.
a struggle between reality and still dreaming.. no one will understand

having this "solo" mentality made me wonder time and again,
when am i finally ready, hw do i define ready anyway.
is it 'being stable'? then what is 'stable'
is it 'maturity'? what is considered 'maturity'
is it to what myself think, or is it to what others perceive as,
is it a comfortable income? is it a blooming personality?
or is it being all rounded in each aspect?
(i always thot it was that, but even then i need to know to what extent,
specifically and clear to my eyes)
i'll give myself some time to think over, and define it.]

i still have plenty to review
i need to know where i stand in each area/aspect now and in the next 3 yrs
i need to know where i can go along my path
kaos, life is troublesome if u take control of it yourself. sigh

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

am i stupid to keep thinking of 'what may have been". yes that girl.
its her bday next mth. shes my 9-10/10 scale girl. definitively
ive knwn a few decent girls but few can match up with her lol.
with due respect, but they are far off mans =x
but maybe im not that standard yet so i dun deserve such a nice lady
maybe there were others around me, but i dun see them
maybe i should be the type to ask for numbers from girls
most say im stupid, i would say im just not that into them. lolx

time to work~

so alike

saw someone like her, very much
hairstyle, size, facial features side-wise
she was in pink, just at the next cabin
i couldn't help but just keep peeking and
kept wondering, wondering, if its her indeed...
but tooo crowded =/

but cant be, her stop was even further than Bedok
which is rare as her mrt line is supposedly NE line anyway
haha i must have seen wrong, but hell, really look quite alike.
=\

Uni Application

Payment made, Offer accepted Part 1 completed
now left next week, Part 2, RELC , submit documents again -_-
yes, submitting of all documents again.
same set of photocopy which i gotta do tml. =/

life is going to get tougher from July onwards isn't it?

nah no way lolx. i won't let that happen. =)

Sundae

had a good sundae outing with my lunch clique
we went to Escape Theme Park
wow searing hot sun it was...
we waited one hour, or almost
for a thrill of 3 rounds for the go-kart =/

not bad, kay kay was infront.
after she went off, desmonster was behind her
followed by "utama' tan jing han, and then me
after the lane was wide, dez shot infront of kay kay LOL
then jinghan and me curve around her

imagine going up circular slope like in carpark..
kay kay went into the inner lane, jinghan middle lane
i was the outer lane, when we reach the top(3rd floor i guess)
i overtook them despite outer lane, jinghan followed
and poor kay kay was behind, =(
but i have to admit the part when the 3 of us were side by side..
trying to go up the slope tgt, was damn hilarious.. hahaha

kay kay later had a headache from the bumpy ride
so she went to rest while the rest proceeded with lunch
then she went to rest in dez's car while we proceeded
i applied and got my nebo membership as well
hehe, good membership this is. quite some vouchers and privelleges
and even go party world ktv got 20% discount! lolx ktv..

anyway, by 3 pm kay kay was revitalized. we all were ready
"Confessions of a Shoppaholic" hahaha
"debu" mark thot it was a sissy show, well it was a little
but it was great financial lesson if you look deep...
so true, and true, very true, to the point u only slap urself when u realise
perhaps the rich can afford to do so, but for most average
credit is "silent poison", numbing you and killing u as time ticks on
thats why robert kiyosaki's rich dad says "don't be average"
i will be "better than average" in the future, for sure

Quotes: "Hi Im Sebestian, I'm not a shoppaholic,
I just spent solely on food and just food, a need, today"

"Do Not enter this call, this is someone calling,
Do Not enter this phone, this is someone calling"

Time/Choice

lyrics from "Time" by backstreet boys,
(just this excerpt)

Time, Look where we are
and what we've been through, baby
Time, Sharing our dreams
Time, Goes on and on everyday,
Time is what it is, come what may


Life is simple.
Its all about choice, just dont regret it...